My wife and I have been married for 12 years. Last month we found out she has terminal cancer and only six months to live. We’ve been fortunate enough to become fairly wealthy during our lives together, and she wants to buy me a boat. We always went fishing together, and her last wish is for me to have the boat I’ve always wanted. Even with this prognosis, I’ll be OK financially when she’s gone. Still, I can’t stand the thought of this. It’s just too painful. Do you have any advice?
Buddy, I am so very sorry. I hope you realize that you have the sweetest woman on earth for your wife. Even with all she’s going through, her thoughts are of you and your happiness. That is one amazing lady.
The first thing I’d tell you both is to make sure your faith is intact. Hug her a lot, and keep talking to, praying with and loving on each other. Be there for her all you can, and keep in mind that doctors can be wrong. It happens a lot, believe it or not, so don’t give up hope.
If she brings up the boat again, just smile and let her know it’s all about her right now. Remind her that she did the nicest thing possible many years ago when she agreed to spend the rest of her life with you. If she’s really stubborn about this idea — something tells me she is, and in the very best way possible — promise her that whether you win or lose this fight you’ll buy that boat someday and name it after her.
In other words, just tell her the truth and be real. If she goes home to be with the Lord, there might come a day down the road when the pain you’ll feel has dulled just a little, and you find yourself sitting on that fishing boat that’s named after her. That would be OK. I’m sure she would be smiling at you while you reeled in a big one. But you’ve got more important things to take care of right now — namely her.
God bless you both, Andrew.
Trashing your truck
My husband has two trucks, one of which is a work truck at his construction site. It’s in really bad shape, and he wants to take $16,000 out of savings to buy another one. We only have $17,000 in the account. What should we do?
Your husband wants to drain your savings to buy a $16,000 vehicle and roll it up to a construction site? I think this guy has been watching too many macho-man truck commercials.
In the real world, some hard hat will run into it with a piece of heavy equipment or drop a load of bricks off center and put some big time damage on this truck before he puts 1,000 miles on it. He wants to buy way too much truck. This kind of decision will wreck your finances and spell bad news for the business, too.
You can buy a perfectly good work truck for $6,000 or $7,000, and that’s what he needs to do. This truck is going to get destroyed, and trashing an inexpensive truck is a much better idea than trashing the family finances!
— Dave Ramsey is CEO of Ramsey Solutions. He has authored seven best-selling books, including The Total Money Makeover. The Dave Ramsey Show is heard by more than 12 million listeners each week on 575 radio stations and multiple digital platforms. Follow Dave on the web at daveramsey.com and on Twitter at @DaveRamsey.
Dave Ramsey: His wife’s final gift